hi my name is Stefan James and today I
want to help you overcome fear fear of
failure fear of rejection fear success
fear of the unknown fear of anything
that's stopping you or holding you back
in your life because listen I know if
you're watching this right now you have
a goal a dream a vision for your life
that you want to turn into reality that
more be more have more and give more and
the only thing the only thing stopping
you is fear but fear can be tamed fear
can be conquered we can learn how to use
fear and utilize it to our advantage
rather than having fear use us and
immobilize us and that's what I want to
help you with today now what is fear we
all have it most people describe fear as
an acronym which stands for false
evidence appearing real
but what fear really is is anticipation
of pain fear is anticipation of pain
that when you want to start a business
but you're too afraid to go for 100% and
turn your dream into reality or you want
to approach that man or woman that you
find attractive but you're too afraid of
rejection or you want to get up in front
of an audience to share your message or
put yourself on YouTube but you're too
afraid of being humiliated or being
judged by other people that that fear is
just an anticipation of pain that your
brain is trying to protect you from it's
trying to protect you from the potential
humiliation the potential rejection or
whatever it is even though we know today
it's irrational listen fear has allowed
us as human beings to survive over
thousands of years was allowed us to get
to the point that we're at today that
thousands and thousands of years ago we
had legitimate dangers and threats that
our fear served an incredible purpose to
make sure that we survive as a species
but today most of the fears that we have
are irrational you know I mean you go
for it you approach the man or woman you
start a business
nothing bad and really is gonna happen
it's not like you're gonna die or
anything versus thousands of years ago
that would be the case
and so we have these irrational fears
and fears job is to keep you within your
comfort zone the realm of what's already
familiar for you also known as your
danger zone because the thing is
everything you want in your life the
amazing relationship the financial
abundance the success to be respected to
serve the world to make a difference to
have an attractive body whatever might
be everything you want right now is
outside of your realm of comfort because
you'd already have it if there's already
within it and so it's gonna require you
to take a step over it you're gonna have
to cross that line and do things you
wouldn't normally do do things are
afraid of and the moment you take a step
over that line outside your comfort zone
you're gonna feel afraid you're gonna
feel anxiety you're gonna feel nervous
and that's a good thing because that
means that you're growing and if it's
not uncomfortable if you don't have fear
then it's already within your comfort
zone and so you should always be
intentionally finding what scares you
and facing it and overcoming it because
on the other side of fear is the person
that you want to be and the life that
you want so how do you overcome fear how
do you conquer it I'll share with you a
few ways number one the way that you
overcome fear is you act in spite of it
okay act in spite of fear feel the fear
and do it anyways that is the way that
you have to overcome it listen the only
way you're gonna conquer this is you've
got to do it now the longer that you
wait the more you micromanage it the
more you get an analysis paralysis the
overthink things the worse that it gets
it's like you know jumping into a
swimming pool off the high dive you know
the longer that you wait to
procrastinate the worse that it gets
versus when you just do it you don't
allowing that fear to grow you know
that's what happens for a lot of people
that you know you want to conquer the
fear and do it when it's small before
you give yourself the chance to turn it
into a monster as Godzilla and taking
over the whole city so you must learn to
act in spite of fear and that's a habit
the more that you do it the better that
you get you know for me I look for
opportunities I'm afraid of that are
outside my comfort zone I know hey you
know what I was terrified of public
speaking but I knew that I had to do it
you know I learned from Tony Robbins and
Jim Rohn that if you can't then you must
that if you know that by doing this even
though you're afraid or terrified to do
it but you know by doing it you're gonna
become a better person you're gonna grow
more gonna be more powerful more strong
more intelligent more resourceful
whatever it might be then I know that I
have to do it no matter what and in
doing so that's how you grow and become
more and if I say you know I'm afraid to
do this but I don't do it then I'm
admitting a limitation to myself I'm
actually cheating myself and everyone
that I love because I'm not living my
life to the fullest and being the best
version of myself for myself and for
other people as well
so fears you have to conquer it you got
to get in the habit of going for it but
I'll give you guys something practical
that can serve you you know a lot of
people say listen Steph and I'm afraid
of starting a business
I'm afraid of investing in this course
and afraid of investing this money that
I have into a business or time you know
and they say well Stephan I'm afraid of
going for 100% but listen my answer to
that is what's the alternative
see you're afraid of going for your
dreams but what you should be more
afraid of is not going for your dreams
that should terrify the hell out of you
you see you should be more afraid of
what your life's gonna be like if you
don't go for it you should be more
afraid of what your life's gonna be like
living a life that you're not living
your potential living a life that is not
really who you are and having this
feeling of regret this feeling of what
if that should terrify you more than the
fear of going for it you should be more
afraid of your life of what it's going
to be like if you settle listen you
should be terrified of that you should
be terrified of continuing to live your
life the way you're living it whether I
said job that you dislike or a job
building someone else
dream rather than your own you know or
not be involved with the freedom to
travel or do what you want so you got to
spend a third of your life working for
someone else until you're 65 does that
not scare the out of you right you
should be terrified of that you should
be terrified of being broke and
struggling and therefore these fears
when you learn to use fear to your
advantage should fuel you and fuel you
into action to doing what's necessary to
go forward a hundred percent because
listen the fear that you might have of
rejection and failure right let's say
it's right here you should build your
fear of not going for it to be up here
and in doing so it conquers that fear of
whatever is holding you back
you know people that I've found that are
most successful or the most afraid you
know they're more afraid than the people
that don't go for it because someone
like myself for example I'm terrified of
being broke I'm terrified of being in
debt I'm terrified of working for
someone else not doing what I love being
miserable each day and having to you
know commute to traffic you know 30
minutes an hour each day and go to a job
and be around people that I don't want
to be around and work for someone I
don't want to work for for a measly
paycheck I'm terrified of that I'm
terrified of one day potentially getting
cancer or heart disease I'm terrified of
getting diabetes I'm terrified of being
overweight and therefore those fears
serve me and empower me and fuel me to
take action to do whatever it takes to
build my body to invest in whatever is
necessary the coaches the programs the
mentors whatever it takes to build my
business to where it needs to be I'm
terrified of being alone I'm terrified
of going to a divorce both my parents
went to two different divorces and I
know the pain of that you know 50% of
people and marriages end up in divorce
and that terrifies me and so therefore
that fear motivates me and fuels me
every day to have high standards my
relationship to be the best that I can
be to make sure that I given to my
partner I meet our needs that we create
love and passion every single day
because I know what the alternative is
listen a mentor of mine Jim Rhodes said
this discipline weighs ounces but regret
weighs ton
the feeling of regret it should scare
you like crazy that you should be
looking in the mirror and that really is
ID and fears that you have or that
you're not going for it you're not
living your life you're not you're
letting his fear stop you and hold you
back from you know it's ridiculous it's
totally irrational doesn't make any
sense so listen the principle to live by
is this act in spite of fear feel the
fear and do it anyways look at whatever
you're afraid of and use fear to your
advantage instead of looking at oh I'm
afraid of going for it I'm afraid of
failure listen be more afraid of what
your life will be like if you don't go
for it be more afraid of that ask
yourself questions that elicit fear and
these emotions in a more empowering way
you should be asking yourself the
question man what if I don't go for it
what's my life gonna be like five years
from now if I don't go for it and make
this change what's can my life gonna be
like if I don't go up there and speak in
front that audience you know what's the
pain what's the consequence of that
what's the real pain of that right
associate not going for it two massive
pain and then look at hey you know if I
do go for it what's the pleasure what's
the benefit how will this enrich my life
hey you know if I start this business
the pleasure is man I'm gonna have
control over in my life I'm gonna make
progress towards my goals and dreams and
at least by going for it even though I
might encounter failures along the way
that's okay I'm gonna learn from it
because there's no failure there's only
feedback and I only fail if I don't
learn as long as I learn something that
is worthwhile because the only failure
is not doing anything listen if you're
not taking action in your life your
feeling right now
you're failing right now so if you don't
try you're ensuring your failure if you
do go for it you might fail but at least
you know you can look yourself in the
mirror each day proud of yourself
knowing that you're becoming more and
you're one of the few who do versus the
many that taught that's who I want you
to be so fear can be your friends you'll
never overcome
fear but you can tame it and you can use
it to your advantage and learn how to
use it by asking yourself these
questions and be you know don't be
willing to settle in your life guys do
not settle stop it because you're gonna
get to your you know 65 years old 70 80
years old I'm gonna be sitting your wat
rocking chair one day looking back at
your life with the ultimate pain because
one day we will surely arrive the
question is where where will you be will
you be a warning in life a warning to
others about how not to live and what
not to do or we be an example of what's
possible in life you're either a warning
or an example and that's your choice so
act in spite of fear make a list right
now guys what are the top fears you have
and commit to doing it commit to doing
it whatever it takes and every time you
do it guys are gonna get more confidence
every time you do it you're gonna claim
reclaim more of herself your real
identity
so I want to encourage you to go for it
face your fears and when you do it you
know you're gonna realize it wasn't that
bad and all the fears that I've faced
now if you're faced many of them I
realize you know it there just didn't
make sense to believe I can't even
believe that I let that stop me hold me
back my whole life you know and once you
do it you're like man why didn't do this
earlier I should have done this way
earlier so the way you overcome it is
get leverage on yourself
get leverage on yourself by realizing
the consequence I'm not going for it and
be more afraid of that that will get you
out of fear that will get you taking
action in a heartbeat
so listen if you guys enjoyed this leave
a comment below hit that thumbs up
subscribe for more videos if you want to
learn more for me learn more how to
master every aspect of your life then
join my life mastery accelerator at life
mastery accelerator com it's my monthly
mentoring program where I go deep into
really mastering each area of your life
and part of that is your mindset your
emotions which we just touched the
surface on here today so I hope to see
you there make sure to always believe
and commit to mastery talk to you soon
you
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