so someone said hey Stefan I'm hoping
that you can help me with making
for many years I find myself over
analyzing opportunities and never making
a decision about what to focus on I
experience fear of missing out on
situations and a worry that I'll make
the wrong decision
even now I have several businesses that
I can start our focus on but I just
can't get myself to decide which and
always change my mind thanks for all
your help now this is a perfect
opportunity to reframe okay because what
you said here is you you overanalyze
opportunities and you never make a
decision okay you experience fear of
missing out and you're worried that
you'll make the wrong decision now who
can tell me what this person's fear is
it's a fear of failure right worrying
about making the wrong decision well
what happens if you make the wrong
decision it can make the wrong decision
then you're gonna lose time or money and
you're gonna fail right or you're
overanalyzing things because you don't
want everything that you want everything
to go right and perfect and you don't
want to experience any failure so what
you're basically telling me in this is
that you have a fear of failure now
based on what I just shared with you how
can you reframe that fear of failure
because the meaning that you have is
that failures bad right
failures bad you don't want to have
failure in your life but every
successful person listen to me now
every successful person that you can
imagine on this planet or if broke
history will tell you that they've all
gone through failure and that those
failures were blessings for them and
part of the process that allowed them to
succeed so here you are trying to avoid
the very thing that you must endure and
go through in order to be successful
you're avoiding it you're avoiding the
failure now do you think that successful
people don't fail of course they do they
feel it's just as much if not more than
the people that don't succeed in life
the difference is they don't view it as
failure they don't view it as failure
they have reframed failure altogether
failure is good for the
feedback its lessons in failure forces
them to grow teaches them a lot of
valuable things and when you view it as
a good thing you know embrace it it's
like the story that I shared about
rejection some people fear rejection the
avoiding I embrace it because that's
gonna help me grow and I know that
that's the path to getting what I want
because on the other side of your fear
is the person that you want to be some
lights that you want to have so when you
reframe fear in that way like what I
recommend you do you're afraid of feel
fear of failure any fear take out a
journal write out that fear and come up
with ten reasons why that's good
why failure is good in your life why you
should fail how it can help you how it
can serve you then go out and read other
stories of successful people read their
biographies and read about how their
failures how that the failures they went
through and how their fields were
blessings read the story of Michael
Jordan and how he failed and got cut
from his high you know high school
basketball team and how that was the
best thing that ever happened to him now
Michael Jordan's got that great quote is
because I feel that I succeed it's got a
great quote Reese I missed the
game-winning shot so many times I missed
so many shots in my life and that's why
I'm successful is because I felt over
and over and over again in my life right
so when you when you understand that you
just have a bad relationship with
failure when you learn to love failure
it's a great thing now when it comes to
failure here's the thing here's the key
you want to make sure that your failures
are manageable okay you don't want your
failures to be the ones that destroy you
okay those are the failures that are a
lot harder to recover from so as long as
their management manageable failures you
can we all have a different level of
tolerance but you know for me like I
fail all the time even to this day and
that's a good thing that means that I'm
trying because I think the biggest
failure is not even trying or doing
anything that's the real failure in life
like right now bro you're failing you're
fail because they're not even doing
anything you're not even in the game
that's the ultimate failure at least by
trying and doing something yeah there's
a risk of failure but there's also a
huge chance of success an opportunity
then you got to focus more on that so
the fail that failure is a great thing
it's just how you perceive it your
perception of it so change your focus
change the meaning that you create from
it make a list of all the good for me
and just make sure the failures are
manageable manageable in the sense where
you know maybe you lose a couple
thousand bucks or you lose six months of
your time
that's recoverable okay you can recover
from that okay
the ones that you want to avoid the big
ones are the ones that you'll lose
everything you lose your life savings
your $50,000 in debt those are the ones
that are very hard to recover from okay
those are the failures you really want
to avoid but the failures of starting a
business and if failing what those
aren't big failures so that you can
recover from that you can get back on
track back on your feet within a few
months right it's gonna work harder than
their job or make some of that money
back or whatever it is those are very
manageable failures
you
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