The Troll that Almost Made Me Quit Business #Best Education Page #Online Earning

- All right, so here's some comments

from some of the YouTube viewers out there.

You wasted three minutes of my life.

I'm sorry.

Research your topic, does that even

really qualify as advice?

And the favorite one as of latest

is just, this was a bad video.

You're going to get people who

are going to say some things that

aren't going to make you feel very well.

This has happened to me ever since I started

doing online business, even before I got on to YouTube.

Now, when I got on to YouTube, I mean the haters

definitely stepped up their game there but,

there is one person in particular

that almost derailed me so much

that I almost quit online business back in 2011.

I'll tell you about him in just a second,

but before that, some advice.

Building an online business is something amazing.

But by being online and doing the things

that you should be doing to build exposure,

to build an audience, you are allowing

yourself to be vulnerable to people

who have stuff going on in their life,

and they feel the need to put it out on you.

And, it's not your fault. I mean maybe

there are some cases where you do get some

constructive criticism that may be using

language that may be a little bit harsh.

But I think it's important to,

when you get feedback that doesn't

really rub you the right way, to step back

and go, okay well is this person actually telling the truth.

And that's always step number one with me.

Anytime I have somebody say something about my stuff

and the work that I'm doing, I always pull back

and go, okay well is that actually true.

Now in the case of the guy who said, you know,

for example, does researching your topic

even count as a piece of advice?

Then I can very quickly and easily answer that,

because yes obviously it is, if you're going

to write a book you want to make sure

that you understand who your competitors are,

and the kinds of things you need

to be inserting into that book, and those kinds of things.

So this person just wasn't completely

understanding what my purpose was of saying that

and I was able to, through a reply,

allow him to understand that, so that's easy.

You can step back, it was about my work,

so I can understand the truth about that.

The hard thing is when somebody talks about you,

and you as a person, and really gets in there

and starts to like, poke you with something

and then move it around a little bit,

and just doesn't make you feel really good,

right like nobody likes being poked.

And sometimes that poking is so harsh

that it feels like a machete being inserted

into your body and it's just the worst

thing that could ever happen.

And it's really funny because we have

this really interesting math as entrepreneurs.

One negative comment, completely

outweighs a hundred positive comments.

You likely get thanked for what you do

or you're gonna be thanked for

what you're gonna do, and people will love you.

And they're going to be very thankful

that you offer what you offer,

and the fact that you exist and are able to help them.

Yet, there is going to be one person

who's going to say something negative about you

in a way that just completely upsets you,

where all those positive comments

don't even matter anymore, and that's hard.

Because it happened to me in 2011, and I almost gave up.

So let me take you back to 2011,

and I'm going to paraphrase a comment

that was left on a blog, it was about

2000 words so I'm not going to read this for you.

I also don't want to give credit

to this person cause they don't deserve

any sort of attention at all.

But, this situation deserves attention.

So this comment called me out as a fraud,

as a scammer, as a con-artist,

as somebody who, if I were actually

indeed making as much money as I was saying

in my income reports, I would be wearing better clothing.

Somebody who would never do this,

if I was actually making that kind of money,

and by doing this it was sharing

my income reports, being complete

open and honest about how I was building my business,

sharing both wins and failures.

And I've done income reports since 2008,

and a lot of people have loved them.

So many people have appreciated them,

some people have started businesses because they've seen,

gotten inspiration, from those income reports.

But this one person was saying such

negative things and was pinpointing every little thing

and having a case for it, it almost made me believe him.

I think that's the worst thing that can happen,

when these haters get so into it

that you doubt your own self and why you do what you do.

Now obviously stepping back, I knew

a lot of that stuff was not true.

But it still hurt. It hurt so much

that I stopped blogging, I stopped creating videos,

and I didn't publish a podcast for two weeks straight.

Basically my life looked like this.

(sad slow music)

(crying and coughing)

Now although I can poke fun of that now,

it was something at the time that really hurt me.

And I didn't want to do anything, I didn't want

to be online anymore, I didn't want to be vulnerable

to that kind of thing, now what made this even worse

was when I finally calmed down,

and I opened up my email inbox,

I saw ten to twelve messages from

some of my friends asking me, hey who's this guy

who's posting this nasty stuff about you online,

and I was like, yeah he left this comment on my blog,

he's like, no he left this comment on my blog.

He'd gone around and posted the exact same comment

on the same blogs were I was featured

as a guest or I was mentioned in an interview.

I couldn't believe this.

I felt defenseless, I felt hurt, obviously.

I reached out to my friends and thankfully

they all deleted that comment right away

and they were offering for help,

and asking me if I was okay, and I would say,

yeah I'm fine, but obviously I wasn't fine.

And I just kind of retreated.

But then-- I do have to say a big shout out

to my friend Derek Halpern who, at the time,

I don't even know if he knows he really did this,

but made a huge impact on me cause

he said one thing that really stuck with me.

He said, Pat, I haven't seen you online for a while,

I know this hater thing happened,

but dude let me give it to you straight,

and Derek always gives it to you straight.

He said, every second you waste thinking

about this hater, is a second

you are taking away from the people who need you.

Who want you.

Who like you.

And that was probably the most useful piece of advice,

cause I received a lot of advice,

I received advice like, oh you

got a hater like you've made it.

I'm like, really, like this doesn't feel good,

like I don't feel like I've made it

when somebody is saying these things about me.

That doesn't make sense to me.

Or advice from people that were just saying like,

just completely ignore, just delete them

off your website, and yes, I did do that,

but it didn't take away the fact

that this person had said this

and also was posting it all over the internet.

But, Derek's advice hit home with me

because I started to remember well why am I doing this.

Am I doing this to please everybody, well no.

Am I doing this to help as many people as I can, yes.

And by focusing on this other person for so long

am I actually doing what I set out to do, absolutely not.

And so, thanks to Derek, thank you Derek

from socialtriggers.com, I was able to start writing again.

And it didn't take long for me to really feel

the positive energy coming from the community again.

This is really something I've never shared,

in full before, other than in person and conversation.

The other crazy part about this story

is I reached out this person eventually

and I asked, why did he do this.

Why did you go through all this effort?

And he said that he saw me as an easy target

because I was so open and honest about everything online,

I was starting to be seen everywhere.

And he said that he was looking

to just try and get more traffic to his website.

And when I heard that, my initial thought was...

(laughs)

How can I help you?

Like, where are you getting this information from

that this is the method that you need to use to grow traffic

to your website, like here are some videos.

I will show you how to do that the right way

without hurting anybody's feelings

and taking others down with you.

Now, I didn't help him, and I didn't offer those videos.

I just kinda walked away and I just couldn't believe it.

I couldn't believe it, and the funny thing

was like he didn't even do it to hurt me.

He did it for him.

And it's really interesting cause over the years,

I've still continued to get comments,

but some playful-hateful comments,

but then some hateful-hateful, hurtful comments.

They've been growing more as my business

has been growing more, and I've been getting

more exposure, which is expected.

I've grown a thick skin, over time, which is good.

And you're going to have to build one over time

for you to be successful in this world, honestly.

It's when you try to build something that pleases everybody

you're actually not going big enough,

you're not taking a stand, you don't

have a stance on something so much

that it actually upsets some other people.

You might be playing it too safe.

You might be just playing it average.

So that's something I consider,

but then the other thing is-- and I learned

this from my good friend, Shannon Ervin,

Dr. Shannon Ervin, who's a neuropsychologist.

She said the following, which really stuck with me

as well, she said, hurt people hurt people.

The video didn't skip there, like hurt people hurt people.

People who are hurt tend to hurt others

because they are hurt, and so whenever

I get a hurtful comment now that seemingly

is like trying to take me down.

I always realize in the back of my head,

Well, wow.

That is a human being who said that.

There must be something going on

in that person's life to give them

the thought that they could do this to somebody else too.

So what's going on, how can I help,

and that's typically my first response.

Like hey, I don't think normal people say that,

there must be something going on

in your life so how can I help you.

So it's interesting, sometimes I will

take the time to reply and have a conversation,

and try to see what I can do to find

where that hurt is so I can help,

and actually some of those people

have converted into some of my biggest fans.

That's not always recommended,

I think the recommended sort of overall

piece of advice for dealing with haters

is to just stay away, right, later haters.

But I took a little bit of inspiration

from Gary Vaynerchuk, Gary V.,

who when he wrote his book "Crush It",

back in 2008 I think it was, he responded

to every single one-star comment.

He even offered to have a conversation

with those people and it was really interesting

because people would reply back,

this is in the Amazon reviews section,

one-star review, Gary Vaynerchuk going,

hey, I'm sorry the book didn't delight you,

can I have a conversation just to see what went wrong?

And to see somebody of that caliber do that

inspired me to do that every once in a while,

and you can kinda have a sense for who might

be coming from a place where you could actually help them,

and others who are just really doing it

for the attention, the trolls and the haters

on YouTube especially and on my blog,

it's like, hey that's my home,

like this is my channel.

Peace, block, IP address done.

And that's that, like you guys

who are still here watching this,

you guys are Team Flynn, like I'm here

to protect you guys too and what's really cool too,

is that as you begin to build an audience

and a community, you guys will begin

to protect each other and protect me too,

I've seen it happen, where somebody will leave

a hateful comment on Facebook or something

about something I've done or said,

or something I've launched, and then out of the woodwork,

like 20, 30 people will come and support me

and for that I appreciate you so much,

and I think it's just the mutual beneficial

relationship we have here that we're all here

to help each other right and that's why this is Team Flynn.

I'm the team captain, I wear the arm band

during the soccer game, but I don't score the goals,

I pass you the ball sometime, but we're

in this together for bigger reasons, and for that

I thank you so much, I hope this video

was helpful and inspirational to you.

Perhaps you are going through one of your hater moments

right now, and realize that it's not you,

it's never about you, and I want to wish

you all the best and hopefully if I

can help one person with this video

like Derek helped me this will be a success.

So let me know what you think below,

have you dealt with haters before,

I'll link to some other fun, interesting

videos from friends, like Ramit Sethi,

who actually read his comments on his YouTube channel

from haters, and that's his way

of dealing with it, and this video's mine.

So thank you so much, I appreciate you,

please subscribe to the channel if you haven't already

and if at any point in the future

you're dealing with a hater and you need someone

to talk to, reach out to me on Instagram

or Twitter, @patflynn, here for you guys,

I know you guys are there for each other

as well, Team Flynn for the win.

#Best Education Page #Online Earning

online earning,make money online, earn money online, online earning, online earning sites,

 make money online free, online money income, earn money online free, money online, best way to earn money online, online income site, money earning websites, best online earning sites, easiest way to earn money online, earn money payment bkash, online money income site